Without preamble, I present you our family’s golden rules:
1. I treat myself and others with love, respect, and kindness.
2. My words are based on the Four Pillars of Speech – Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it helpful?
3. We are the choices we make. Is this a good choice? Determine an action’s priority by its Impact. Is it the right Time? Place, and Occasion (TPO)? What are the consequences of my choice (CC)?
If I were to add a fourth, it would be, as Elsa has famously said, to “let it go.”
Let me go back a little. Today was another typical day with my daughter’s tantrum. It seems like her daily tantrums have been reaching new heights. What was not typical about today, however, is that today’s the eve of our long awaited trip to Korea. (In five and half years!!)
I see chaos around me. (Well, more than usual. LOL.) I’m still packing, rooms are messy, dirty dishes are stacked up in (and outside) the sink, you know the drill. Nevertheless, I decided to have a chat with her. It wasn’t that I hadn’t tried. I’ve had many chats with my daughter about how her words and actions were not appropriate and had been hurting my feelings. On one occasion, I even shed some tears while at it. But this time, I decided to set some simple rules so that she could align her actions. We tried setting some other rules before. It didn’t work. Too many. Too complex. The rules were short-lived because they weren’t reinforced on a daily basis. So this time I tried to simplify them so that we could all remember them better.
I’m not sure whether I should be writing this post right now. Nevertheless, I am taking time to write this post. Lately, I’ve been focusing too much on what’s urgent. It’s been days that I haven’t slept properly. Working on what, you say? As usual, the never-ending list of tasks. Wrapping things up for the nonprofit I work for, coping with the many tasks that entailed with the end of my daughter’s school year, catching up on housework. Not to mention prepping for this trip. I am reclaiming my time and space for a little me-time. I am quite satisfied to have the tasks written down.
As I type this, I hear my daughter burst into tears. (Sigh.) I write a little more, holding my ground. Thankfully, she’s calmed down on her own. But she is calling me. “Mommy, can you please come?” She’s asking it nicely. Ok, back to reality! So long!
Uz's Alley 