September
September is the month
That summer turns to fall.
Vacation time is over,
It’s back to school for all.
Even though I’m sad
How fast the summer ends,
I’m very glad that I have a chance
To meet new friends and make new friends.
Sia’s been reciting this poem for the past few days. I enjoyed it. This afternoon, on our way back home from soccer, I offered to learn it by heart. Even though the poem is short, it took me a 15-minute ride to fully memorize it. Surprisingly, Sia was patient the whole time. She didn’t mind when I missed something or couldn’t remember a line.
She just said, “I’ll repeat once more. You listen. OK?” And she would go again. And again. And again. She was very happy when I finally got the whole poem and suggested we let Daddy hear it and learn it too. (The first part was easy enough, but the latter, not so much. Daddy flatly refused: He was busy fixing dinner for us while we took a shower.)
Just before going to soccer, Sia and I had a row. It’s pretty much the same thing these days. She dawdles, and either my husband or I get mad. We tell her threateningly that we would be late at this pace and/or she wouldn’t get to do something because we are late, but she doesn’t mind. She takes her time. Usually my husband or I end up yelling. This is saying something, since my husband hardly yells. He yelled at me only twice or so, and I’ve known him since 1997. But at Sia, it’s more like twice a week, or even twice a day.
It’s the worst in the morning, but it’s not only the mornings. Take this afternoon, for instance. We were checking off her calendar for the days that we read together for more than 20 minutes. This is the one homework we got from her school. I told her that in five minutes we had to stop taking stock and get ready for soccer. She was mad at me for checking off a date because she wanted to do it all by herself. I told her that I was sorry, but all I wanted to do was to show her when the streak ended so that she could check off all the dates in between.
No use. She wouldn’t listen. She got all mad and hit me on the chest with her fist. I told her that we don’t hit other people even when we get mad. It’s ok to get mad, but it wasn’t ok to hit somebody else. At the end, Hubby ended up yelling at Sia. He told her that he would tell me to skip soccer and stay at home if she keeps it up like that. That seemed to do the trick, but not without shedding a few loud tears first.
Soccer was good, but eventful. There are four kindergarten girls, including Sia, in this casual “league.” A friend, whose husband loves soccer and volunteered to offer a soccer class for free, asked us whether Sia was interested, and we joined two weeks after the sessions started. This was our fourth session together, but the girls are not very close yet. They didn’t have enough time to bond outside the soccer practice.
Out of the four, three girls ended up getting upset and cried for one reason or another. (It must be the weather or something.) Sia didn’t so much cry, but started yelling when I engaged myself with the older brothers who were bored and getting in the way of the practice. She started yelling. “You’re Sia’s mom and not (his/their) mom! I am not going to allow you to play with anybody else. You’re mine!”
I said as calmly as I could, “First off, Sia, I’m not yours. And you’re not mine. You belong to you and I belong to myself.” Maybe this was not the best tactic to calm a jealous child. At least I added, “I’m sorry that you are upset, but Mommy can play with other kids too. It doesn’t change the fact that Mommy is your mommy and you’re my daughter, and that we love each other.”
This made Sia feel better, but she still wouldn’t let me play with the other kids. I didn’t want to interrupt the practice further, so I obliged. A little later, one of the boys I was playing with ended up crying partially because of this. I felt bad.
Today we had some play time at the playground after the soccer practice. Four soccer moms and six kids had twenty extra minutes. That seemed to have a calming effect on the kids. All the kids seemed much happier when we said goodbye. That may be the beauty of the kids. They forget easily and they engage and immerse themselves in whichever task at hand. A little play time, almost always, does the trick.
Everyday with Sia (still) seems like a challenge. And maybe, just maybe, that’s the beauty of life with a child. While I’m sure October will bring its own set of challenges, I’m glad that we were able to end September on a peaceful note with our own special recital in our car. I’m grateful that I have this to remember this September by.